2 really is the worst number.
Way back when, I had 3 horses. The OGs. The 3 chestnuts. When we lost Hayley, we added Jiminy. When we lost Batts, we added Nay Nay. But, after Subi, we just stuck with 2. 2 really is the ideal number for my property and finances (actually, 1 is the ideal number but we’re not going there) so 2 it is. With Nay Nay still NQR, adding another riding horse was ideal but it leaves a new challenge: separation.
NOTE: after everything that unfolded with Jiminy and conversations with my vet, I am not willing to entertain the idea of a mini ever again. I have the perfect setup for a mini and even then the metabolic issues compounded and there was nothing I could do. This wasn’t the first time my vet has seen it (though, to be fair, Jiminy was a unique case in that his weight was ideal and he STILL had issues) and it’s heartbreaking every time. Unless I was dealing with a super well bred mini without any known risk factors in their genetic lines (and even then, they’re minis), I couldn’t do it.
So that brings us to this bunch. Nay Nay and Cairo. Nay Nay has always been weird about being left. He’s always been fine doing the leaving and less fine being left. Now that I think about it, he’s never liked being left even if he wasn’t alone. So, if I pulled out Subi and left him with Jiminy? He was displeased. But, it was fine.
Now, with the 2 of them? I need to come up with a solution. I don’t feel that it is true separation anxiety because once the horses are reunited? He has zero interest in the other horse (in this case, Cairo). There is no greeting, not sniffing, no touching noses. He just walking immediately past and goes about his day. It’s very odd.
My vet suggested that we start by leaving him in his stall and just see how he reacts. Give him something tasty and just see how it goes. He lasted about 4 minutes before he had an epic meltdown. Weaving, screaming, kicking, etc. Soaked in sweat. Brain fell out of his head. 0-100 in seconds. Even when I turned him out, he was trying his hardest to hold it together but…
Next suggestion was a tree of knowledge type of situation. Instead of the tree, we tried a stall tie (the tree may have been less dangerous, but I don’t even know). He didn’t really fight the tie, but he had a similar reaction. Hopping/dancing on his front legs (not rearing, just bouncing), soaked in sweat. Ignored all hay, kicking, screaming, meltdown that got worse. My neighbors ended up calling to see what was going on. He escalated to the point that I worried he’d hurt himself. With a tree, he’d not be able to kick, but he’d probably try and climb the tree and smash his body against it…
The last 2 times (Sunday, Monday) I turned him out in the round pen. I did a little bit of ground work and then left him. He did a tiny bit of grazing (more Sunday than Monday), some trotting (more Monday than Sunday), an anger roll (Sunday), some calling (more Monday than Sunday), but nothing dangerous. He didn’t appreciate it. But, no cantering, lots of walking (more Sunday than Monday), very little screaming (more Monday than Sunday but on Monday Cairo started it). So, definitely the best of all the situations. But, Monday was worse than Sunday. Before I turned out, I did do some additional ground work and both times he immediately zeroed his focus onto me. So, I never lost his brain. It was 100% an “I don’t like this” vs an “I’m going to die” situation.
Someone also suggested that I try Warwick Schiller focus work. Whether I do this in addition to continuing the other round pen work or instead of it, it looks interesting. If nothing else, it certainly can’t hurt. I’m going to play around with it.
I definitely want to start riding Cairo soon but I suspect I’ll have to haul both out to start. It is what it is. At this point, I’m aiming for the week between Xmas and New Years to start riding. But, hopefully come sometime in the New Year, I’ll be able to just take one out.
I will add, Cairo doesn’t seem overly bothered to be alone. He did call out to Nay Nay once or twice on Monday, but he was never upset. He never moved from the hay even when he called for him. On Sunday, he couldn’t even be bothered to voice any acknowledgement that Nay Nay wasn’t in the paddock with him.
Three Chestnuts 
I hate separation issues with horses. Not fun at all! Hope you figure it out. Maybe a stuffed horse for Nay? Emotional support stuffie??
I just need to be cloned so I can stay with Nay, work with him, pay attention to him, give him a job, AND also take Cairo out at the same time 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
It seems like you’re working through the right steps. We have some at our barn that are extra sensitive to separation and others that are completely fine. Let us know what ends up working for you!
Definitely! It sucks. And I truly can’t figure out if it’s being alone that is the issue or if it’s being ignored. If someone was focused on Nay and working with him when Cairo left? He might be ok (ok if I was working with him, he might be OK).
I quite understand why you don’t want another mini. But have you considered a donkey? Apologies if you have, but if you want a small equine, then it doesn’t have to be a mini.
It could be something to consider in the future (if I’m on another property) but I’m really maxed out right now. And, with my luck I’d be posting about desensitizing my TBs to a donkey. But right now, I can’t add anyone else to the herd.
LOL! That’s true, I’ve heard of horses having interesting reactions to donkeys.
I thought about minis too for a third because the two weren’t working, but I also haven’t seen anyone with great luck keeping them healthy long term. I figured if it’s always going to be something anyway, why not another full size horse. For the record, three equines isn’t working any better for me than two as far as seperation anxiety and my one problematic horse. Keeping it consistent is what works for her, like you are doing I give her a job and take horse(s) away as a regularly as I can and make the comings and going as unpredictable as I can so she’s not putting me on a time limit or getting ramped up because she knows it’s coming 🙂 I think it really is down to the individual. Sounds like you’re on a path to success!
That sort of makes me feel better-ish. LOL I think Sophie and Nay Nay are very similar with their brains… I’m not sure that’s a compliment for either of them.
separation anxiety is no joke.
Okay, I know this sounds ridiculous and I cannot reference my sources because I don’t remember where I read it… But I once read about someone that had a mirror for a horse that had separation anxiety and it really helped. It obviously wasn’t a glass mirror. Maybe something like my barn has in the indoor which is just a mirrored wrap/coating on wood. Or maybe the article person had a plastic mirror… I dunno what it was but it wasn’t something the horse could not get hurt on. Maybe something to try? I’ve noticed that the mirrors in the new indoor seem to put Al at ease a little. I think he knows it’s his own reflection but just seeing “another horse” in the ring with him seems to settle him a bit in there. (He doesn’t get separation anxiety, he just hates indoors.)